We all carry on language patterns from our families - the old tomaeto vs tomauto debate. Kids have an additional language pattern which most grow out of. Most words in this language happen because young minds and mouths can't pronounce the English words the rest of us use. I've noticed our Munchkins have a few words that have stuck around. But cutest by far . . . are all of their variations on MY name.
Tabafa
Tabfa
Taba - taba (slow)
Tabataba (fast)
Taba
Initially these variation were because they had a problem pronouncing the 'th' in my name as I was getting to know them (and dating their father). Now their precious variations on my name alleviate the awkward 'what should they call me' moments most stepmothers have to deal with. I hope they never lose them, but am sure they will reach a moment around puberty where they'll feel the need to leave behind such childhood habits.
Monday, June 29, 2009
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
Joys of Small Business (i.e. family, money, and time off)
Dear small businesses owners:
You have my condolences and my congratulations. I never understood before my own business venture the hardships and joys of owning and running your own business.
* The never ending worry about money, staffing, and maintaining excellent customer service.
* The satisfaction of a happy diner, a gushing thank you letter, a successful event and regulars.
* The disappointment of a bad dinner service, a slow week, or money down the drain.
* The freedom to make you own schedule, take an extra day off, or decide the course of your efforts.
* The ownership of each success and failure alike.
A family run business has its own particular hardships and joys. Everything is personal and work always comes home with you. Everyone pitches in when the need arises, yet much remains unspoken. Every success is more meaningful. Every failure is more personal. Relationships affect every decision for the good and the bad. It can be a deal breaker or sealer.
Here's to you who take on business ownership, who make your own way, and work the long hours after everyone else has gone home. I prayer the best for you. I hope that you get ahead far enough to retire or pass on your legacy rather than working full time until you are 90. I pray for your health, that your body can withstand the hours, stress, and worry of owning a small business. I wish the best for all relationships and family members involved that all survive the trials of running a business and all come out unscathed on the other end and better for the experience. I understand now.
You have my condolences and my congratulations. I never understood before my own business venture the hardships and joys of owning and running your own business.
* The never ending worry about money, staffing, and maintaining excellent customer service.
* The satisfaction of a happy diner, a gushing thank you letter, a successful event and regulars.
* The disappointment of a bad dinner service, a slow week, or money down the drain.
* The freedom to make you own schedule, take an extra day off, or decide the course of your efforts.
* The ownership of each success and failure alike.
A family run business has its own particular hardships and joys. Everything is personal and work always comes home with you. Everyone pitches in when the need arises, yet much remains unspoken. Every success is more meaningful. Every failure is more personal. Relationships affect every decision for the good and the bad. It can be a deal breaker or sealer.
Here's to you who take on business ownership, who make your own way, and work the long hours after everyone else has gone home. I prayer the best for you. I hope that you get ahead far enough to retire or pass on your legacy rather than working full time until you are 90. I pray for your health, that your body can withstand the hours, stress, and worry of owning a small business. I wish the best for all relationships and family members involved that all survive the trials of running a business and all come out unscathed on the other end and better for the experience. I understand now.
Grandparents (ie. breaking the curse)
This is re-post from last year which I removed to honor an uncle's request, but it needs to said. I love you grandpa!
June, 2009
Tonight I said Goodbye to my grandparents for, what I believe is, the last time. My grandmother has burnt has last bridge with my parents and my grandparents will be leaving tomorrow to live on the east coast. They will be living with their last child.
My grandmother has a long and sordid history of alienating and/or disowning one or all of her four children. It's a sad thing when the strongest memories I have of my grandmother are negative ones. It's a sad thing to watch a woman at the end of her life make the same prideful mistakes she made before you were even born. A lifetime of illness and fragile health brought about from resentment and a hardened heart. How can a mother disown a daughter who left her family and business in distress to 'rescue' her - move her lock, stock, and barrel into her own home sacrificing her own family to care for her parents? I don't understand it, but I watched it happen. In thinking about my grandmother, I have chalked her up to one of life's lessons - one I need to learn from. So what can I learn from my grandmother's lifetime of selfishness and self pity? OH, Let me count the ways!
1) Grow up. Mature with age and gain wisdom as you go. There's nothing less attractive than an 80 year old woman with the emotional maturity of a junior higher.
2) Learn from your mistakes. Life may be a spiral, but every time you come around again, the hurdles should be easier.
3) Age gracefully. Bitterness poisons you from the inside out. If you want to live a long and healthy life - live a happy life not storing up offenses and spewing at those around you.
4) Be real. Life is to short to fake your way through it. Life should never be about putting on a smiling face and pretending the ugliness of the night before never happened.
5) Give without the expectation of receiving. Give for the joy of giving not the satisfaction of being recognized. No one should feel guilty for not writing a thank you note.
6)Love without conditions. What do you have to cling to at the end of your life, but the relationships you've built throughout the course of it? Destroy them and you will be a sad, bitter, lonely old woman with nothing but your pride to cling to.
My greatest hope is to not carry these lessons through to my kids. I have enough to learn from in my life without repeating the mistakes of my ancestors.
THIS IS MY PRAYER . . .
May my pride not blind me to my own shortcomings.
May I have the grace to admit when I am wrong, the humility to make amends
and the desire to do better.
May I remember that all we have take from this world into the next are the
relationships we cultivate.
May my desire for control not control me.
May I love unconditionally, give without hesitation, and live joyfully.
GROW up and LEARN from your mistakes, AGE gracefully, GIVE without expectations, and LOVE unconditionally. Did I miss anything?
June, 2009
Tonight I said Goodbye to my grandparents for, what I believe is, the last time. My grandmother has burnt has last bridge with my parents and my grandparents will be leaving tomorrow to live on the east coast. They will be living with their last child.
My grandmother has a long and sordid history of alienating and/or disowning one or all of her four children. It's a sad thing when the strongest memories I have of my grandmother are negative ones. It's a sad thing to watch a woman at the end of her life make the same prideful mistakes she made before you were even born. A lifetime of illness and fragile health brought about from resentment and a hardened heart. How can a mother disown a daughter who left her family and business in distress to 'rescue' her - move her lock, stock, and barrel into her own home sacrificing her own family to care for her parents? I don't understand it, but I watched it happen. In thinking about my grandmother, I have chalked her up to one of life's lessons - one I need to learn from. So what can I learn from my grandmother's lifetime of selfishness and self pity? OH, Let me count the ways!
1) Grow up. Mature with age and gain wisdom as you go. There's nothing less attractive than an 80 year old woman with the emotional maturity of a junior higher.
2) Learn from your mistakes. Life may be a spiral, but every time you come around again, the hurdles should be easier.
3) Age gracefully. Bitterness poisons you from the inside out. If you want to live a long and healthy life - live a happy life not storing up offenses and spewing at those around you.
4) Be real. Life is to short to fake your way through it. Life should never be about putting on a smiling face and pretending the ugliness of the night before never happened.
5) Give without the expectation of receiving. Give for the joy of giving not the satisfaction of being recognized. No one should feel guilty for not writing a thank you note.
6)Love without conditions. What do you have to cling to at the end of your life, but the relationships you've built throughout the course of it? Destroy them and you will be a sad, bitter, lonely old woman with nothing but your pride to cling to.
My greatest hope is to not carry these lessons through to my kids. I have enough to learn from in my life without repeating the mistakes of my ancestors.
THIS IS MY PRAYER . . .
May my pride not blind me to my own shortcomings.
May I have the grace to admit when I am wrong, the humility to make amends
and the desire to do better.
May I remember that all we have take from this world into the next are the
relationships we cultivate.
May my desire for control not control me.
May I love unconditionally, give without hesitation, and live joyfully.
GROW up and LEARN from your mistakes, AGE gracefully, GIVE without expectations, and LOVE unconditionally. Did I miss anything?
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